Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Baking Boot Camp, Day Three

The final day of Baking Boot Camp and I had a tag-along with me on my trip to The Chopping Block since Rick was taking a knife skills course that started at the same time as our final day. On arrival, I met our instructor and sous chef for the final day: Chef Paul and Chef Graeme.


Chef Paul worked kitchen jobs in college. He graduated from Purdue (my dad's graduate alma mater) with a degree in electrical engineering. He worked for a few years in an engineering firm before he decided that he missed the restaurant world and went to culinary school. He's worked his way up to executive chef and owned his own bakery/diner.

Chef Paul had made us up a phenomenal breakfast. Scrambled eggs with Parmesan and fresh herbs (and bacon, for the meat-eaters) in a whole wheat pita, pumpkin scones with maple glaze, died fruits and nuts and plain Greek yogurt. I could have easily eaten about 6 of the scones and they are one of my least favorite baked goods. So tender and moist!


The real bummer of this day was that Noelle finally succumb to her head cold and called in sick, so I was partner-less for the day. Gah! So much work to do!

Speaking of partners, here's Jen and Tim getting ready to get down to business on our last day!


Here was how the day played out:

Pie Crust: Yes, we had made an extra pie crust on our first day, but we had cut the butter in by hand (all the food processors were being used by another class) and the dough ended up being very dry. Chef Paul wanted us to start over, this time using a food processor. It came together much better. I actually prefer not to use food processors for much in the kitchen, but this is the task for them. It allows the butter to remain cool, yet still get broken down to the pea-sized state it should be in. Patted that into a disk and threw it in the fridge.


Linda and Diana with their pie crust



Almond Paste: Chef Paul showed us how to put together a good almond paste to stuff our croissants with. I'm not a huge almond fan, but it was delicious! I wonder if I could make up something similar with hazelnuts. I'd have to find hazelnut extract...


Shaping and Baking Croissants: I thought the roll-out for the final step of shaping and proofing the croissants was going to be a nightmare. Our dough had so many sticking issues on Day Two, I was basically imagining a buttery mess. Thankfully, it had sufficiently cooled overnight in the fridge and rolled out like a charm (unlike my rolling out experiences at home). I learned some great tips for cutting into croissant shapes and was taught how to add paste and chocolate to crescent shaped croissants. Croissants were proofed and then baked and came out looking (and tasting) delicious.


To be honest, I prefer my recipe. The croissants tasted okay, but the layers did not seem to be as crisp and flaky as the Epicurious.com recipe. Interestingly, the good folks at King Arthur Flour blogged a croissant recipe VERY similar to the recipe given to us at the boot camp on our last day of boot camp. I'll probably have to try it again to make my final decision, but it seems like the epicurious.com recipe is more French--the way the layers explode in your mouth when you bite into them--and the recipe we did in the Baking Boot Camp is more what Americans think croissants should taste like--softer and more pliable.


Lemon Lavender Cookies: We got our cookie dough logs out of the fridge, cut them into slices (about 1/3" thick) and tossed them in the oven.

Once they came out, we frosted them with a simple vanilla frosting and topped them with lavender buds and the candied lemon peel.


Creme Brulee: We pulled the ramekins we filled yesterday out of the fridge.


A little sugar sprinkled on top, a propane torch and these puppies were bruleed!


Linzer Cookies: What can I say? It's a Linzer Cookie recipe. Jen helped me with all the cut-outs. It was tough doing it all on my own!




Pie Tart: We rolled out our pie crust and fit it into the tart pan.

I had a few thin spots so I bulked them up with a little of the extra crust. After poking holes in the bottom, we put down a sheet of parchment paper and filled each tart pan with pie crust weights. The crusts went into the oven to bake. Meanwhile, we made the tart filling.

Tart Pan all Baked with the filling ready to be poured in! Once the tart filling was in, we dropped in a few raspberries and those went into the oven to bake.


All done!



Italian Buttercream: On our first day, Chef Ethan was going over the different tasks we'd be accomplishing each day. I asked if we were going to be doing an Italian Buttercream, he said no. He was lying. If you're wondering what an Italian Buttercream is, let me preface the process by first saying that what you usually think of as a buttercream frosting is fake. It's not a frosting that a baker would call "buttercream." (This may explain the confused answer from Chef Ethan.) Italian Buttercream is a made in the following manner: 1) Take eggs and whip the living bejeezus out of them until they reach the ribbon stage. That's where, when you pull the beaters out of the egg mixture, the beaters trail a ribbon on the mixture that isn't immediately reabsorbed. 2) Meanwhile, you should be cooking a simple syrup to a softball stage (exactly 240 degrees) on a stove. What's the softball stage? Well, you dip your fingers in boiling syrup to see if you can form a soft ball with it. Sound insane? Pastry chefs are a special kind of crazy. Thankfully, Chef Paul took care of checking this for us. 3) While you're cooking the syrup, you should also be melting the chocolate in a double boiler. This is a chocolate buttercream frosting, by the way. 4) Once your syrup hits the softball stage AND your eggs are whipped to the ribbon stage, you pour the syrup down the side of the bowl (if you pour it directly into the eggs, it will cook them) while you're constantly mixing. 5) Once all of the syrup has been incorporated, you add the butter, a piece at a time. When I started doing this, the mixture lost a ton of volume. Chef Paul came over and pulled my bowl and the butter and threw them into the fridge. He then collected everyone else's bowls and butter and put them in the fridge, too. Apparently, the kitchen was way too hot and had heated the butter too much. He was worried the frosting wasn't going to be salvageable. After 20 minutes or so, we pulled them out and all that worry was for naught. 6) After the butter is all incorporated, I whipped the buttercream for another several minutes to help add more volume. 7) Pour in the melted chocolate while continuing to beat the frosting. And...Bob's your uncle! Italian Chocolate Buttercream frosting. The flavor is the comparable to the fake stuff, BUT the texture! *dies* It's like silk on your tongue!


Chef Paul pouring syrup into my whipped eggs.


Frosting the Cake: We cut the two Devil's Food Cake layers we baked on Saturday in half horizontally. Yes, this is a 4 layer cake. Since we didn't have cake stands, we ended up putting the cooled cake layers on upturned cake pans.

Apparently, I'm not the only person who uses those in a pinch. The caramel ganache went between each layer. We did a crumb coat with the buttercream--which is basically just a thin coat of frosting that keeps the cake from showing through.


After a quick trip to the fridge, we pulled the cakes back out and finished with another layer of buttercream. We were then presented with the option of coating the sides in roasted hazelnuts. Hazelnuts are my favorite kind of nut, but I'm generally opposed to nuts in baked goods. When Linda and Diana pulled the nuts out of the bag, the aroma hit me and I was sold! The nuts went on the side of the cake.


Then it hit me: Noelle's not here. I have to take all of this home...on the Metra. Chef Carolyn from Day 2 popped into our room to see how we were doing and I managed to foist off the chocolate raspberry tart and 2 creme brulees onto her. I gave away a tray of plain croissants to Linda and Diana. I gave another creme brulee to Chef Paul. But still, this is what I had to lug home with me. And yes, the backpack is full.


I was so exhausted by the end of the the day, I literally just wanted to fall in a heap. I never really entertained serious ideas of becoming a pastry chef, but these three days showed me in no uncertain terms that this is not a line of work for me. I haven't done manual labor since my days working at a plant nursery summers in high school and I'd forgotten how physically exhausting it can be. The extra calories burned are just NOT worth it when you're so tired, you feel slightly nauseous.

In all, I had a blast and would highly recommend it, but I'd also make sure that I took the next day off of work in order to recover! Thanks for the memories, guys!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Baking Boot Camp, Day Two

Wow, my head is still spinning from all the work we got done today! The theme for today was custards and fillings and the director for all the fun today was Chef Carolyn our resident pastry chef master and Claire as our pastry sous chef. Before joining The Chopping Block, Carolyn had taught pastry classes at Cordon Bleu, so her process was quite a bit more by-the-book than Chef Ethan was. She was very good at gaining everyone's attention and moving the class along at a brisk, but not frenetic pace. It was nice to be able to read the recipe and KNOW that's what we were going to do. Though I personally kind of liked Ethan's "that's-what-it-says-but-we're-going-to-do-it-a-little-differently" attitude since that's my approach to baking, it's not the greatest teaching technique. Claire? Well, she was just phenomenal and is poised to not only join our CDO club (that’s OCD, but if you’ve got it as bad as we do, you prefer if acronyms are alphabetized) but possibly to become president. All our ingredients were set out when we got in this morning in a certain area and in a certain way. Dirty dishes were immediately removed. Clean items were always available. She was the queen of organization. Both Noelle and I were ready to take her home.

Our fearless teachers


Shaping and Baking Brioche: Our Brioche dough from yesterday had proofed well overnight in the fridge. The first job we had in the morning was to shape it into dough. This is not the “pat-into-a-rectangle-and-roll-and-tuck” kind of bread loaf. Brioche gets divided into 36 equal parts and then rolled into small balls and placed side-by-side in a well-greased loaf pan. When it rises for the last time and is baked, it comes together as a loaf.

Here’s a pic of Diana and Linda rolling their brioche dough rolls.


And the finished product!


Pastry Cream: Carolyn started out talking about how pastry cream recipes can be thin, slightly thicker for piping into eclairs, or even thick enough to cut into slices. (I say we slap a slice of pastry cream in between two slices of brioche and cover the whole thing in chocolate ganache for the MOST DELICIOUS SANDWICH EVER! We can call it the Croque Fussée in my honor.) The recipe we used was for piping into éclairs. It should really be used only for cutting into slices. Here’s the recipe I use for pastry cream (swiped from Baking Illustrated):

2 c. half and half
½ c. sugar
pinch salt
5 large egg yolks
¼ cup cornstarch (the recipe calls for 3 Tblsp., but that’s not enough)
4 Tblsp unsalted butter (cut into 4 pieces)
1 ½ tsp. vanilla extract (I always toss in a little more)

Or sometimes I use this one (from Joy of Baking):

1 ¼ cups milk
½ vanilla bean. split lengthwise
3 large egg yolks
¼ c. granulated sugar
2 Tblsp all-purpose flour
Scant 3 Tblsp cornstarch

So, the thickening agents in a pastry cream are the egg yolks, the cornstarch and in the Joy of Baking recipe, the flour. (Usually you see either cornstarch or flour, but the Joy of Baking recipe has both and it works just fine—maybe a little thicker than the Baking Illustrated one, but still a great texture for filling éclairs.)

I didn’t bring my instructions home tonight (d’oh!) but this is what I remember of the pastry cream recipe we used:
2 c. heavy cream
1 vanilla bean, split and scraped
1 egg
3 egg yolks
½ c. granulated sugar
¼ tsp. salt
1/3 c. cornstarch

What the recipe we used today got right? The vanilla. It was bold and flavorful, though I get annoyed at having to scrape vanilla beans. What did it get wrong? It was WAY too thick. Heavy cream + the eggs + 1/3 cup of cornstarch = sheets of a substance that resembled Jell-o and not a thick pudding. It never even bubbled on the stove—only thickened. By the time Carolyn told me that it was ready to pull from the heat, it was about the consistency of English muffin dough. I usually pull it when it’s a slightly thin pudding texture. After all, it continues to thicken while it cools. To make matters worse, we threw the pastry cream in a quarter sheet pan and spread it to cool even faster. I learned a few tricks, but I’ll stick with the recipes I’ve used in the past.

Pate a Choux: The dough that becomes the éclair shell, or, if you feel like something smaller, profiteroles (cream puff shells). If you ever thought it would be fun to cook a dough in a pan on the stovetop, this dough is for you! There are a lot of eggs in pate a choux and since I’m not a huge egg fan (I mean, it’s fine for pastry cream, but that’s got dairy and vanilla in it, too) I’m not really a fan of this stuff, either. Still, I learned some tricks for piping the éclairs onto the pan. Yes, I said “piping.” Remember, this dough is a little different.

And here they are!



Chocolate Glaze: The eclair topping. Like a ganache, only with light corn syrup to help stabilize it a bit. It was fantastic, though it’s always so tempting to just eat it with a spoon.

Here are the final products!



Croissant Folds: Ye gods, this is going to be a massive failure! The dough is too slack, the butter is poking through in a million places and we’re not allowing enough time in between folds. I just want to refer everyone to my croissant post to prove yet again that I KNOW how to make croissants. I just think this process is too crazy and the recipe just a little off (though I like the slight variations on the folds and might incorporate them into my regular recipe).


Caramel Ganache: Have you ever made caramel? I have and it was a nerve-wracking experience. Check out instructions for making caramel sometime and you'll see the MASSIVE warnings about crystallization. It’s almost as if the “they” that writes recipes is anticipating your imminent failure. It doesn’t sound like a horribly difficult process: just place sugar and a little water and then brush down the sides of the pan to rid of the crystals. You can’t stir it. You just have to stand there and watch it boil…and pray that no crystals form. And you have to wait until it’s a deep amber color, but if you let it go too long, it burns. Gah! You have to worry about crystals AND burning?! Once the caramel is done, you add heavy cream to it and return it to a simmer. Then pour it over chocolate and some butter and you have caramel ganache. We set ours aside of a while to let it cool and whipped it up at the end of the day. That’s what we’re going to frost our Devil’s Food Cake with tomorrow.


Mmmm…cake optional. Let’s just eat this ganache! (that’s the glaze behind it).



Linzer Cookie Dough: Nothing too shocking about this recipe. We're going to roll them out, cut them and make them tomorrow.

Crystalized Lemon Peel: Easy enough here. We started this yesterday by cutting lemon peels very thin, blanching them 3 times and soaking them in a simple syrup with peppercorns, star anise and a vanilla bean. Today, we drained them, then tossed the peels in granulated sugar and put them on a rack inside a pan to dry overnight. They're supposed to be a garnish for a lemon-lavender cookies, but we made way too much, so Noelle and I were munching them as treats. I'm definitely making these and dipping them in ganache in the future.

Here they are on our tray!


My partner, Noelle, posting pics on Facebook


Jen and Tim getting ready at the start of the day.


And here I am at the the end of the day. Yes, it looks like the Swedish Chef assaulted me. I get flour everywhere.


Remember what I said about wanting the Wolf Oven? Yeah, well, I think you can see why!


Tomorrow is assembly day!

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Baking Boot Camp, Day One

For Christmas last year, one of Rick's presents was a 3-day (6 hours per day) Baking Boot Camp put on by The Chopping Block--a culinary school for the masses in Chicago. They only have the boot camp a couple of times a year and this was the weekend for it (usually, it's Friday/Saturday/Sunday, but they took over Monday this time around because it's President's Day). There are only 6 people (including me) in the class--5 women and one guy. It was my second time at The Chopping Block, though it was my first time attending an actual class. The first time was for the Quaker Law Department Christmas Party two years ago when we did an Iron Chef-style competition with three teams of law department employees and their spouses. (Best. Christmas Party. EVER.)

The Chopping Block is a nice-enough facility with several teaching kitchens outfitted with All-Clad pans, Wolf stoves (*WANTS*) and the Worst Mixers Known to Man: Viking Professional Mixers. They're so awful, one of our instructors, Chef Ethan, said he was embarrassed that they use them. He's been nagging the owner to replace them with Kitchenaid models. All I can say is that the engineers that designed those mixers must have graduated from Michigan State. None of the attachments--dough hook, paddle attachment and whisk actually reach the ingredients at the bottom of the pan. If you're trying to beat up butter until it's creamy, it's a major failure since it sits at the bottom of the pan mocking the paddle that's clearing just above it. What a nightmare! If it wasn't so heavy, I'd lug in my Kitchenaid tomorrow to make things easy on myself and my partner, Noelle.

What did we do today? It was largely a prep day. If people came with their appetites ready, they were disappointed. We started dough for brioche (that was interesting--can't wait until it's done), croissants, and lemon lavender cookies. We baked up devil's food cake that we're going to assemble on Monday. We beat the butter for croissants (all I can say is this is the strangest croissant dough recipe I've ever seen). Things we actually made and were able to eat? Burger buns (been there, done that) and a rustic deep dish apple pie made in a Springform pan. How were they? I personally think the King Arthur Flour Burger Bun recipe from their Cookbook is way better and tastes better than the recipe we used. Part of that was because they proofed it in the oven due to time constraints. Our lunch was comprised of burgers on our buns. They made me a grilled cheese with rustic bread. I think I got the better end of that deal. The apple part of the apple pie was phenomenal! But I've always been VERY "meh" about pie crust in general. And yes, I've had very flaky pie crusts;. (We hit Norske Nook every time we go up and return from Minneapolis and they routinely win national awards for their pie.) It's just, if I'm eating butter and flour, it's going to be in a croissant or add some sugar and it's a cookie. Pie crust just doesn't TASTE like anything to me. Calories with no taste? What's the point? But throw some crisp on top and I'm in heaven! We added some spiced rum and vanilla to the sugar we tossed the apples in, which made all the difference. The carmelization was INCREDIBLE!

I have some reservations about their croissant recipe. First of all, their recipe takes 3 days to finish and it's not just because we're only there for 6 hours a day. They honestly believe that you need 3 days to make croissants. Let me just refer you to my post on making croissants. 16 hours. Tops. Longer if you really want it to, but not much more than that. Also, Chef Ethan insisted that the best way to do the butter was to beat it in the Worst Mixers Known to Man then try and form it into a rectangle and chilling it overnight. Nah. Smacking it with the rolling pin is not only more more therapeutic, it also keeps the butter sufficiently chilled so you only have to chill it for 20 minutes or so before inserting into the dough and doing your first fold. Besides, I'm pretty sure the boulangieres in France a few hundred years ago didn't have the Worst Mixers Known to Man. I'm pretty sure they used the rolling pin method.

Tomorrow: Pate a Choux, Pastry Cream, Chocolate and Caramel Ganaches. All stuff I've done before (save for the Caramel Ganache), but I'm hoping to pick up on few more techniques.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Never Mind

Weigh in today before the weekend and I'm down two pounds. Must have been retaining water on Tuesday. Okay, so only two more pounds to lose and seven thousand calories to burn.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

4 Pounds Up

So...I lost a ton of weight last year. Not a ton, really, just 45 pounds. But lately, it's been creeping back up. The funny thing is I don't think it has anything to do with baking because I foreswore baking anything sweet during the month of January (trying to help peeps at work out with their resolutions). I've been doing what I call "desperation eating" for the past couple of weeks. It goes kind of like this. I'm in the pantry, putting dishes away and all of a sudden, my brain screams "FEED ME NOW!" So I tell my brain to shut up and pop a couple of dried cherries into my mouth just to appease it a little. A couple of dried cherries is no big deal, right? Maybe 20 calories tops and I am almost always way under my calorie count for the day. Sure, no big deal, unless I'm doing it several times a day...which lately I've been doing.

I have to burn 14,000 more calories than I intake to lose those 4 pounds. Fourteen thousand calories. (It's more impressive written out.) I'm hoping I can do it in 3 weeks, but it could take much longer. Is a couple of dried cherries a pop really worth it? Not even remotely. I threw the dried cherries away and am keeping kitchen time to a minimum. Unless I'm baking of course. For some reason, I'm never hungry when I'm baking and I almost never eat what I bake. (Dunno why, I just don't really enjoy it that much.)

On that note, Baking Boot Camp is this weekend! Rick got me a present for Christmas: a three-day Baking Boot Camp put on by The Chopping Block. Most of the stuff we're going over I already know how to do, but it will be nice to hopefully learn some cheats and new techniques. I'll be at the Merchandise Mart Chopping Block 10am-4pm Saturday, Sunday and Monday. Of course, pictures and experiences will be posted to this blog sometime next week.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Making Croissants

If there’s one thing I’m “good” at making, it’s croissants. They’ve become Rick’s favorite, and I have to admit are better than any I’ve had here in the States and better than most I had in France. Rick says it’s not fair that my croissants taste so good because they make all other food taste bad by comparison. So, with Valentines Day rolling around, I decided it was time to bake him up another batch! Unlike other times I’ve made these, I remembered that I should photo blog the entire process so my friends can read along and try their own hand at croissant-making.

Some tools you will need to have on hand:
-plastic wrap (sorry, Eileen, no way around this one)
-a pastry brush
-a rolling pin
-a yardstick or measuring tape
-parchment paper
-jelly roll or half-sheet pans
-clean kitchen garbage bags
-bench knife (you don’t really need one, but it’s kind of helpful for dividing the dough and scraping up the butter)



The first step is to get a good recipe for butter croissants and read, read, read it. I’ve found that baking experiences are always better if I have a vague idea of what the steps are and there are a lot steps in this one! I use this recipe at Epicurious.com. It hasn’t failed me yet. This is a recipe for laminate dough which can be used for many different things—not just croissants—so don’t be surprised that this recipe only takes you through the folds stage. They’ve got another recipe for making the dough into croissants. More on that later.

Let’s talk about time. Yes, this recipe does take a lot of time, but you’re not active for most of it. It does require you to be available for a good portion of said time, though. My preferred way of recipe execution is to start around 4 pm the night before I’m making the croissants. It means you’ve got a nice evening of doing folds in between loads of laundry or episodes of a TV show and allows you to proof in the morning while you’re working out (have to burn off all the calories we’re going to consume eating the flaky deliciousness). You can really do it anytime it fits into your schedule. Expect that you’ll need to be available for 5 hours during folding period and 4 hours when you’re rolling out, shaping and proofing the croissants. (I know this sounds like a lot of time, but remember, you just need to be available. This is not active time. The croissants have to proof for 2 – 2 ½ hours, so you have plenty of time to run some errands, just keep an eye on the clock so they don’t over-rise.) Factor in that you need to let the dough rest in the fridge for at least 8 hours, and the evening/night/morning schedule seems to work out best. But hey, maybe not in your household.

Get your mixer out. Don’t have a Kitchenaid? I’m sure that you could do this by hand, but it will take more elbow grease and you’ll need to increase the kneading time significantly. Ready? Let’s get to it!

In your mixer bowl, throw in the following:

1 tablespoon + ¼ teaspoon of active dry yeast*
1 ½ cups 2% (or whole) warm milk**, heated to 105-110 degrees
¼ cup packed light brown sugar.

*I usually use instant yeast in my other baking so I can skip the yeast proof process, but this recipe calls for active dry. Since I have some on hand and wouldn’t use it otherwise, I haven’t been bold enough to ditch it and use instant. Once I run out of active dry, I’ll try the instant yeast, but until then I’m really loathe to tamper with what works.

**No matter how much you’re trying to cut fat and calories DO NOT use skim milk. Skim milk does not act like milk during baking—it acts like water. If you drink skim milk at home, more power to you, but pick up a small 2% milk for this recipe alone. (The recipe calls for whole milk, but 2% has always worked just fine for me.)

CONFESSION: I’m a total loser when it comes to estimating the temperature of things, so I have to use an instant read thermometer to check the temp of the milk. I bet moms are super-good at this with all the bottle temperature testing. (Heather, I’m looking at you.) I heat the milk in the microwave in 30 second intervals, checking after the first two blasts and after each one thereafter. Here I am, checking the temp of the milk. A little warm, so I let it cool on the counter for a couple of minutes.



Stir the ingredients together a little bit. You don’t need to mix it much, just a couple of turns in the bowl with a spoon is fine. Walk away for five minutes. Spend it clearing a good space in your fridge.



When you come back it should look foamy like this.



If it does, you’re golden. (If it isn’t, something is up with your yeast…or the temperature of your milk. In any case, it’s not going to work, so ditch it and start over. )

Add the following the mixing bowl:

3 ¾ cup unbleached all-purpose flour^
1 tablespoon kosher salt^^

^Flour brands do matter. I always bake with King Arthur Flour because I know they’re persnickety about the milling process and I find I get the best results with it. But if you can’t get it in your area (and it is kind of expensive) then stick with Gold Medal flour. Store brands…well, you get what you pay for.

^^Seems like a lot, but trust me, you want salt in croissants. Oh, the FLAVOR!

Slap the dough hook on your mixer and mix the ingredients together. You’ll knead it for approximately 7 minutes on the first speed if you’re using your Kitchenaid. You’re looking for a very smooth (baby’s bottom comes to mind), slightly sticky dough.

See those strands sticking at the bottom? I know it looks like a sticky mess, but it really doesn’t cling all that much to your hands.



Dust a little bit of flour on your work surface. Take the dough out of the mixer and knead by hand for a couple of minutes. This is less about the kneading process and more about incorporating a little more flour into the dough until it’s a little less sticky and more manageable. This is always best done by hand.



Form the dough into a 1 1/2 “ thick rectangle. Wrap it in plastic wrap (turn away, Eileen) and chill it for an hour. Time to go watch an episode of Justified!



Hour’s up? Okay, time to shape the butter. This is the most bizarre step when you’re making croissants. I still giggle every time I do it.

Take 3 sticks (1 ½ cups) cold unsalted butter# and lay them out horizontally on a counter.

#I use Whole Foods 365 organic unsalted butter. I’ve used higher fat butter, too (like Président or Plugra butter) but I get the same results that I do with the regular fat butter. I do organic because my stomach reacts less to organic dairy than it does with non-organic dairy, but I’m sure you’d be fine with the regular stuff.

Grab your rolling pin and start whacking the butter. Seriously. Pound it. Take out all your frustration on it. You’re trying to get to a point where the butter becomes malleable but is still cold. Feel a little nuts doing this? Oh, it gets better. Grab a clean kitchen towel† (I always struggle to find a clean towel without dog hair on it—thanks Ruth) and place it on the counter.



Scrape up the butter mass with a bench knife or sturdy spatula and plop it on the towel. Cover it with another towel (or, the other side of the towel if it large enough) and roll it out until it’s about an 8”x5” rectangle. I’ve got a kitchen measuring tape that I keep on hand for these kinds of things. Still giggling? I know I am! Okay, our goal through this entire process is to keep the butter cold, so stick the whole thing—towel and all—in the fridge while you’re rolling out the dough.



†This can’t be a terry cloth towel so I hope you have at least one flour sack towel hanging around. If not, I recommend you add a few to your kitchen stash. My grandma converted me after college and Rick won’t use anything else. They just seem to dry things better.

Get out your dough and roll it out into a 10”x16” rectangle.



It doesn’t have to be those exact measurements, but make sure you’re doubling the measurements of the butter block. You probably already have the dough oriented properly, but if not, the short side should be closest to you now and through all of the folds. Take your pastry brush and brush off any excess flour.



This is going to be a constant when you’re working with this dough. You want the dough to adhere to itself, so you want to keep any flour at a minimum. You will get flour EVERYWHERE in the kitchen. Just pretend you’ve been invaded by the Swedish Chef for a few hours.

Once you’ve got it rolled out, grab the butter from inside the fridge and place it in the middle of the dough.



Fold the bottom up over the butter. Fold the top down over the bottom—like a letter. Brush off excess flour as you are folding.

You’ve incorporated the butter! Yay you! Now you do your first real fold:

Roll out the dough into a 15”x10” rectangle. You shouldn’t have an problems with this yet, but if butter starts poking through the dough, just take a little flour and dab it on the butter so it doesn’t stick. Once it’s rolled out, fold again like a letter. Bottom 1/3 up, top 1/3 down. That’s your first fold done!



Wrap it in plastic wrap and stuff it in the fridge for an hour. Set your timer so you don’t forget.

Do 3 more folds in the same manner, one hour apart.‡ During the last fold, you’ll notice more butter poking out of the dough.



This is normal, though annoying. Keep patting with flour to keep it from sticking.
‡Some pastry chefs say you can do the 2nd and 3rd folds at the same time. I don’t doubt this, but I haven’t tried it yet, so I hate to recommend it. In any case, you’d only save yourself one hour and in the grand scheme of things, it’s not a lot of time.

Wrap the dough TIGHTLY in plastic wrap. When I’m doing the folds every hour, I usually just wrap it pretty loosely, but this will be in the fridge overnight rising like nobody’s business, so make sure your plastic wrap is sealed up. Once it’s in the fridge, it’s time to drift off to la-la land.



TIME PASSES
Zzzzzz… I’m not going to lie. I don’t sleep well when I have croissant dough in the fridge. Too much anticipation.

When I get out of bed the next day, this is what awaits me.



And you thought yeast doesn’t work in the fridge. Surprise! This is why you need to make sure you wrap it tightly. If it busts out of the plastic wrap, it can dry out the dough, which makes it even harder to work with. (If this does happen, don’t freak out. It hasn’t ruined anything. You’ll just be cursing under your breath a lot more when you’re rolling it out.) Divide your dough in half.



Tightly wrap one half and stick it back in the fridge.

Here’s Epicurious.com’s instructions for making up butter croissants from your laminate dough. Personally, I recommend hitting youtube.com and looking at videos of people shaping croissants and rolling/cutting out the dough. I still do that each time just to remind my muscles what they’re supposed to be doing.

Now that you know how to shape the croissants, it’s time to get your equipment together. First, the pans. Place parchment paper in two half-sheet or jelly roll pans. You need shiny aluminum pans to bake croissants or any recipe that has a high volume of butter in it. If you bake them on pans that are typically grey non-stick variety, then the croissants will burn on the bottom before they’re baked all the way through. I personally love Nordicware’s half-sheet pans as they’re sturdy and don’t warp, but any commercial-style uncoated aluminum pan will do. Grab the flour container, pastry brush and rolling pin that you became so attached during the folding process and set them out of the counter.



Dust your surface with a thin layer of flour. You’re going to need it far more than you did yesterday. Roll out the dough to a 16”x12” rectangle—or as close to that as you can manage. CONFESSION: No matter how many times I’ve done this, right about this time is when I think this whole mess has failed miserably and I’ve wasted nearly a pound of butter, several cups of flour and hours of my time over something that should just be thrown in the trash. Cold dough does NOT appreciate being told what to do and the gluten keeps snapping back on you. (Because croissant dough needs to stay chilled, you can’t set it out to warm it up.) On top of that, add the fact that the butter pieces start poking out everywhere while you’re rolling and you keep having to pat them down with flour so they don’t stick either to the countertop or to your rolling pin, which ends up making the dough even stiffer and you really are going to want to throw in the towel. DON’T!!!!! It will all work out in the end, just keep rolling. After a couple of minutes, the gluten settles down and the dough warms up enough to acquiesce to being rolled.

If you haven’t already, align the dough so that the short end is towards you. Cut the dough with a pizza cutter (you can use a sharp knife, too, but I’d rather not since I work on granite and I don’t want to damage the knife or the granite). How should you cut it? Well, that depends on how large you want to make the croissants. For your first time I recommend cutting the dough into thirds horizontally and then cutting isosceles triangles from that. OR, if you want to make larger croissants (which I did this time around) you can cut the triangles from the dough as depicted below.

One thing to note while shaping the croissants that not everyone shows in the videos on YouTube: it helps if you notch the dough as shown in this picture.



It just makes the rolling that much easier. I’ve also noticed that if you hang onto the tail while you’re rolling with your other hand, it makes for a tighter croissant. Maybe not something to try your first time around, though.

You’ll see a lot of videos that tell you to leave at tail on the croissants at the end. Bull crap. It looks stupid if you do it that way. Just make sure the tail is on the bottom of the croissant and it won’t unroll while proofing. Curl the ends towards the end of the tail and put it on the parchment paper.

Once you’ve shaped all of the croissants, stick the pan in a clean garbage bag, invert a glass and stick it on the pan and tuck the open end of the garbage bag under the bottom of the pan. It’s best to set it someplace warm (not hot) where you don’t have a lot of drafts so they proof evenly.



Oh, and “proofing” is the final rise for yeast breads like this. They don’t actually rise that much—the dough mainly gets puffy. You’ll see.

Don’t think the frustration is over! You’ve got another bit of dough in the fridge! Depending on how large your pans and croissants are, you may be able to get all croissants done in one round. If so, fantastic! If not, grab another set of pans with parchment paper so you can shape and proof the second batch of dough right after you shape and proof the first batch. If your second set of pans aren’t shiny aluminum pans, that’s fine. Just let the aluminum pans cool down to room temperature after baking the first round, then transfer the parchment paper with the second batch of shaped and proofed croissants to the aluminum pans and bake the second batch.

Gah! After rolling out and shaping another batch of unforgiving dough, I usually need an outlet to relieve my stress. I have 2 ½ hours before they’re going to be ready to put in the oven (our house is cool, so rising and proofing takes a little longer than most), so it’s the perfect time to take a long run. By the time I’m done, showered and with my hair dry, it’s usually time to fire up the oven and get ready for the baking process.



Ahhh…the run wasn’t the greatest, but at least I didn’t feel like a complete failure while I was running. Time to heat up the oven to bake these puppies!



The secret to the wonderful flaky, crispy croissants in France is that they’re baked in a steam oven. Once I win the lottery, I’ll get a $60,000 steam oven imported from Europe, but until that time, I have to make do with what I’ve got. So, grab a spray bottle and make sure the racks in your oven are in the upper and lower thirds. Heat your oven to 425 degrees. Once the oven is heated, remove the inverted glass (try not to knock it over on any of the croissants) and take the croissants out of the garbage bags. Open the oven door and spritz the crap out of it! Shut the door for a second. Then open it again, place the croissants in the oven—one baking sheet per rack—and spritz some more. Shut the oven door, turn the heat down to 400 degrees and walk away for 8 minutes. Don’t open the oven door, whatever you do. The recipe I use says 10 minutes, I found in my oven, 8 minutes is best. Just keep an eye on them the first time to decide what works for you. By “keep an eye on them” I mean that use the oven door window and the oven light because you’re not opening the door, right? ;-)

After they just start to develop a very light brown on the top of the croissants, it’s time to move the pans around. Switch them on the racks and rotate them 180 degrees. (I have to do this with all my baking since the back of my oven is far hotter than the front.) Bake for another 8-10 minutes. (The recipe says to lower the temp to 375, but I often don’t. I have a cool kitchen and my oven loses a lot of heat opening and closing the door.) Check them at 8 minutes to see if they look done. If not, let them go another couple of minutes. It also depends on the size of your croissants. I made up some real monsters this time around, so I left them go for 11 minutes on the second go-round.

When they get that darker brown look on top, pull them out! Let them cool on the pans for a minute or so, then transfer them to a rack when they’ve cooled down enough to handle.





Julia Childs and her egg wash can totally bite me. How could you get any more beautiful than this? Besides, shiny croissants make me think of shellac.



Let them cool for a few minutes! There’s nothing worse than burning your mouth on the first bite of something delicious. Then you can’t taste the rest!

I prefer my croissants with strawberry jam (homemade, if I have it…I almost never do).



Rick just pops them in his mouth. He says it takes to long to bother with the jam.



Happy Valentines’ Day, sweetie! I love you!

Okay, you know the deal now go forth and create!